The Blessing of Never Walking Alone

This year, like many years has been full of ups and downs, doors shut and windows open, memories made and moments treasured. If I could sum up 2012 with a simple phrase it would be, ‘Never once did I ever walk alone’.

So here I am, sitting in a vintage lazy boy in what we call ‘the piano room’ at my house, a cup of joe at my side and tears welling up in my eyes as I live back on the beginning of the year. To be honest with all of you it was rough. No one really would have known anything was wrong but deep down inside my heart I knew I was not in a healthy position in the relationship I was in. I felt I was ignoring the signals God was giving me. I was praying for direction but avoiding handing myself over to the choices God was nudging me to take.  Fast forward a few months, difficult conversations were had, numerous tears flowed from my eyes, and a breaking point happened. Six months into the year I found myself in a position I had not been in for the past two years. Single.

Psalm 123: 1-4

¹ The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
² He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
³ he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s sake.
⁴ Even though I walk
through the darkest valley,^[a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

 

After that breaking point, God granted me with a waterfall of grace and mercy. He lifted a burden, freed my heart, and granted me the strength to forgive. Within a week I reconnected with several dear friends, was blessed by countless amounts of affirmation, and had the joy of a fun-filled schedule to free my mind.

Never once did I ever walk alone.

Summer was filled with a wonderful trip with my mom to visit family out in Las Vegas. This included a day trip to visit my bone marrow and kidney donor, Celeste, and her family out in Huntington Beach California. This year I also celebrated my ten year anniversary of my original cancer diagnosis date, October 16, 2002. Tears are coming to my eyes again as I replay memories in my mind of the lowest of low days in the hospital, but my heart overflows with the unimaginable amounts of support, prayer, and love poured into my family and me during that time. God let us through that journey with an army of prayer warriors and a wise medical staff. I did not fight that battle alone.

Never once did He leave us on our own.

Classes began again in the fall and I am honored and humbled at the support, knowledge, and wisdom that flow from my professors and staff at Kuyper College. I was blessed with the position of being one of the TA’s for the Greek class, and had the humbling opportunity to share my testimony and a Bible teaching of the Samaritan Woman at the Well for chapel at the college. (If any of you would like to read a copy of my teaching and story, I would love to e-mail a copy to you). Along with crazy good memories made, friendships created, and so much information learned, this semester rocked my socks off. God is good.  I have so glad to be a part of the Kuyper community.

You are faithful God, You are faithful.

The end of 2012 brought a sliver of what the New Year will bring; I will be attending Grand Rapids Theological Seminary to start my Masters in Counseling starting in January. I have two classes left at Kuyper College before graduating in May with a degree in Pre-Seminary and a minor in Greek and communications.

So what else may 2013 bring?

I am not sure what adventures will come up in 2013, but my hope and prayer for myself and those reading this, is that the Lord may bless it immensely. I pray for clear direction, courage to jump into the unknown, and for peace and mercy to rain down upon each of us. I pray God will grant us patience in times of desire, comfort in times of distress, and joy in all circumstances.

I am starting a new tradition this year. I have a mason jar ready to except the memories, treasured moments, answered prayers, and lessons learned in 2013. I look forward to a year from now to look back on the way God moved within my life. Get excited.

My first paper is my Bible verse for 2013- Ps. 27:13-14- Wait on the Lord.

May you all feel God's presence and know you are never walking alone.

Marissa